Now Judge, I know this is gonna sound kinda wild, but...

Good morning, faggots. Just wanted to let you know that I apologize for being absent for so long from my beloved blog. I know you can hardly start your pathetic days without my vitriolic prose. Well you're gonna have to wait a little longer. I am currently on jury duty and in a trial. In fucking Worcester, MA. And this town is 100% guilty of being a shithole. Just awful. When the trial is over (Thursday or Friday) I will tell you all about my wonderful time here in the stinking asshole of America. Until then, I thank you for your patience.  

No, I'm sure anyone other than Spanish Johnny understood that Bruce reference in my headline. No, Spanish Johnny isn't the only person who reads this blog anyway. No, Bruce-related humor isn't the highest form of humor that can be achieved by mortals.